*“If the person you are talking to doesn’t appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.” Winnie the Pooh

So much wisdom from a “silly old bear.” As we encounter people in our daily lives they are often experiencing more than a little fluff in their ear. Too often we have so much going on we fail to listen to or seek to understand others. We just do not have the time…things have to be done, we have places to go, appointments to keep and etc. Life is fast and busy.
In Pooh Bear’s quote it is not the fluff that is at issue rather it is the “be patient.” In our world of hurry being patient is often seen as a luxury and it is a rare commodity. Yes, we do have to make things happen, we do have places to be, and appointments to keep. However, none of those things keeps us from practicing intentional mindfulness or being patient with others and ourselves. A definition for patience, that I like, is this: “an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay; quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care; diligence.” This definition is front-end loaded by starting with the words “an ability or willingness.” The word “willingness” points directly to the fact that we have an opportunity to choose how we will interpret the actions of others and how we will respond. None of this is to say our To-do list is any less important than another’s list. What is being said is that we do not know the struggles being faced by the people we encounter nor do they know ours. They may or may not notice the gift of patience we choose to give them. Their noticing is not the point. The point is that our choice to be patient is a brief moment of grace in this busy life.
So what do we do? First, we make a choice to become patient. After choosing to become more patient make a list of the things that really push our buttons. Some examples might be traffic, waiting in line, customer service, or slow texting. If you have a hard time identifying what makes you impatient just ask those who love you. Once our list is made be aware of those situations and moments as they arise in our daily lives. The practice of patience starts when we choose to take 3 deep breaths before responding. The practice continues as we count to 10 and process/focus on what we are hearing or seeing. Choose to listen deeply to what is being said and actively decide to slow our responses. We will not always be patient but we can always choose to practice being patient.
1. Decide to be patient.
2. List our triggers for our impatience.
3. 3 deep breaths when being triggered.
4. Count to 10 or more as needed.
5. Listen deeply.
6. Respond slowly and thoughtfully.
7. Repeat from step 1 several times each day.
Grace and Peace.
Steve

*“Everyone needs a hand to hold on to.” -John Mellencamp
The great American poet, John Mellencamp, goes on to write and sing: “Everyone needs a hand to hold on to; Don't need to be no strong hand; Don't need to be no rich hand; Everyone just needs a hand to hold on to”.
 
This is so true, and it is a simple fact that we are healthier when we are in supportive relationships. A quick online search revealed more than 91,000 song lyrics, (I did not read them all), with the sentence “hold on.”  I will dare say that the majority of those lyrics are addressing human relationships in one form or another. In this age of hit-and-run anonymous social media, we are losing the intimacy of relationship/friendship. Aristotle saw friendship as a state of character and said, “For without friends, no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods.” In The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis writes: “To the Ancients, Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue. The modern world, in comparison, ignores it.” Oftentimes, we measure our individual value on the number of friends we count. However, true value is in the quality not quantity of those we call friend. Truthfully, having a friend is only one side of the equation, the other side, the most important side is to be a friend, a genuine, authentic, real, no expectations or repayment kind of friend. Today, tomorrow, and the next do not ignore the opportunity for us to be “a hand to hold on to” for that person who truly needs a friend. We collectively need to know friendship is a contact sport! The time is coming all too quickly that we/I will need “a hand to hold on to; Don't need to be no strong hand; Don't need to be no rich hand; Everyone just needs a hand to hold on to”.
Grace and Peace,
​Steve

​* Someone is sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago. Warren Buffett
* Mr. Buffet is inspiring us to think beyond ourselves and to do big things that will benefit others. I have heard on more than one occasion a paraphrase of Galatians 6:7 "that you reap what you sow." That quote was not always being used in a positive light and was usually aimed at poor behavior and the outcomes of poor choices. How might I take the Galatians paraphrase and view it in a positive light? For me, I must "Begin with the end in mind" Habit #2 from Stephen Covey. I must be very clear and know that the end result is being sought to produce a positive outcome. I must also know that I may not be the direct benefactor of the outcome. So when does all of this focused, intentional, "Begin with the end in mind" positivity start? I'll answer the question with another question: "When is the best time to plant an oak tree?" short answer - today! Let's get started right now asking ourselves what might "I" do today that is beyond me and bigger than me. What type of seed will I plant regardless of who enjoys the harvest?
Grace and Peace.
Steve

* Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence. Helen Keller
* Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.
Proverbs 13:12 (NIV)
* Helen Keller tells us we have to believe positively in what we are doing or we will not reach the goals we have before us. The Proverb tells us that if we do not reach our hopes we become sick; however, we are energized and full of life as hopes and goals are realized. We all face challenges and we all come up short at times. The successful effort, for each of us, comes in getting up and faithing again. I have to re-evaluate my hopes/goals at times and make different plans. I know the new plan may delay reaching the goal. But if I take a hint from the Proverb I will, at times, focus on mini-goals that lead to the end/ultimate goal. Why? because longings, hopes, and goals that are reached provide me and you with the energy, optimism, faith, hope, and confidence to get things done!
Grace and Peace.
​Steve

* "Infuse your life with action. Don't wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator, not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high, but by doing what you can to make grace happen... yourself, right now, right down here on Earth."
​Bradley Whitford

What a great place for me to start this project! Our lives are to be filled with doing...doing what is good, doing what is full of Grace. Be it opening a door or creating a space in traffic we all have an opportunity to do something that is a good and right action today! Look for your opportunities today Don't Wait begin now....Go make a difference.
Grace and Peace.
​Steve